Thursday, October 31, 2013

The way I see it

Middle-schoolers in Halloween costumes=adorable (even the one who said "I'm a pin-up girl. My mom really wanted me to be one.")
Adults in Halloween costumes=amusing and acceptable as long as I can see your face and you don't act weird
Kid in my Literature class who was Dr. Who and answered questions in a struggly British accent= I found you annoying before, but now you are embarrassingly insufferable
Couple who just walked into the HFAC dressed as Han Solo and Princess Leia with their baby in a giant R2-D2 stroller=absolutely winning Halloween

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Thanks a lot, Orlando Bloom

I have long straight hair, and every now and then I like to pull it half back. Unfortunately, this was also the hairstyle given to Legolas in the Lord of the Rings movies. For many years I have tried to avoid looking like a man-elf by having bangs and making sure there is some volume in my hair when I pull it back like this. Today, though, my hair was really flat and my bangs were too long to not pin back. I didn't have time to redo my hair, so basically, this is what I looked like when I had to stand in front of a room of judgmental middle schoolers:
Sit down children!

Thursday, October 3, 2013

What's More American?

Back in the day, I was in a youth choir called “Voices of a New Day.” Apparently, it was once prestigious-ish, but by the time I was in it, it was mostly a small group of kids who did not want to be there and a very frustrated director. We did sing at the National Christmas tree thing once. And then when we got home my dog was paralyzed and we had to take him to the dog hospital for surgery that he never really recovered from. In preparation for what I assume was a Fourth of July concert (which I don’t really remember, so maybe not), we sang a song called “What’s More American?” It was ridiculous. It would list a whole bunch of things that I guess the lyricist thought were “American,” and then ask what’s more American than those things??? I am! I am! I am! Unfortunately, I quickly forgot the lyrics to the song, and only had vague memories that it was really really bad. Then today, while looking through a middle school choral library, I found it! A whole packet of “What’s More American?”s. And so I typed up the words:
What’s more American than Corn Flakes? The Fourth of July and Uncle Sam? What’s more American than baseball? I am! I am! I am!
What’s more American than toothpaste? Rock n roll, peanut butter, toast and jam? What’s more American than O.K.? I am! I am! I am!
The Stars and Stripes, the Capitol Dome, bubble gum...
There’s General Grant, and Robert E. Lee...
But most of all you can count on little old me! Me! Me!
What’s more American than ice cream? Chow mein, pizza, Virginia ham? What’s more American than Bingo? I am! I am! I am!
Ours is a heritage, second to none. We are a nation, united as one. Our Founding Fathers gave us that start, and their love for our country lives on in every heart.
What’s more American than football? And TV and mighty Superman? What’s more American than Swaaaaaaneeee? I am! I am! I am!
The Bill of Rights, and Betsy Ross, the Liberty Bell, and Paul Revere’s horse...
Old Santa Claus, and a Christmas tree...
But most of all you can count on little old me! Me! Me!
What’s more American than praying in the church of your choice across the land?
What’s more American than saying I am?!